Only Lizard Dog and Squirrel were available to travel. Perhaps it was a better idea just to stay home, in hindsight. But as much as I’d like to grieve about my mistakes, I’m here to write them down. We first ventured East, where the voice of some woman called to us for aid. It was suspicious from the start, but we decided to follow the voice anyway.
Hours later, we realize that there is no woman. We cannot find her. Squirrel Girl and Lizard Dog insist there is something watching us, and at first I didn’t believe them. Of course I wouldn’t, for the description was nonsense. The head of a badger, the body of a lion, and stag hooves.
Turns out they were right. After much chasing, we eventually stumbled upon its lair. The fight was quick enough, but I suffered a terrible wound from its bite. Who knew badgers had such large and unpleasantly sharp teeth?
There was little else out East, so we travelled West and fought a sparing few creatures along the way. It was terribly routine, even with just three of us. Lizard Dog was hurt pretty bad by an owlbear, but he shrugged it off. What a trooper.
The next day, we came across an ancient and ruined tower. It reminded me of the tower on the island, but once I inspected it I realized it was made by elves long ago. Not the twisted minds of whatever from that island. I did not think it entirely safe all the same, but curiosity got the better of me. That was a terrible mistake.
We had sprung a trap. Curse Squirrel for not recognizing a dumb trap like she should have! The gate behind us fell on Lizard Dog and impaled him. We struggled to get him out, but the gate was too heavy. Next thing I know, Squirrel Girl is lying bleeding on ground. I draw my sword, but I never even saw what attacked me.
I woke up naked in my skivvied, chained to a wall. Squirrel was tied up like some hog on the bed. I do not dare contemplate the purpose of keeping us alive, so we struggle to escape. But I realize we are both wounded and unable to fight very well. Not against this threat. I turned to Squirrel and suggested she go out the window. She had better chance of surviving and escaping than I did. I am too large and not very stealthy I go out the other way, intent on distracting the creature. I’m not sure why I was not afraid. I think it was because I knew I was already dead. I did not think it fortunate to still be alive.
I don’t remember much about what happened before I woke up, covered in blood and potion mix and on top of the body of my enemy. But it must have been a glorious and dangerous fight. Sadly, it would come to be my last. As I got up, I felt the weight of my body crush down against my leg. I couldn’t walk very well at all.
I wait with Lizard Dog (who was barely alive), hoping Squirrel comes back. She did, and with Cleric/Queen of all people! Good thing I got dressed.
As we take long journey back to Wynnysburg, I feel my spirit fade and lose itself in the thick trees. The only life I wished for was a warrior’s life. Now I have nothing but a title thrust upon me, and the deeds both true and false to carry me for the rest of my life. But I don’t want pity. I want to be useful.